The Three Parts of Driving Through Life: Fuel, Brakes and Steering

In counseling work for ADHD, I often use the metaphor of driving a car and simplifications around this for workability.

We have the fuel and the gas pedal to accelerate. This is like “zooming in”, sympathetic nervous system, stress, adrenaline, noradrenaline, cortisol, dopamine, and stimulants.

We have our brakes and shock absorbers. This is like our “zooming out”, parasympathetic nervous system, serotonin, antidepressants, relationships, oxytocin, antipsychotics, clonidine, guanfacine.

But many may forget that we have to drive/steer this car as well. Knowing where to go. Which direction. How to use our Sat Nav. Knowing our blind spots with rear and side mirrors. Mindful of what is on our dashboard. Getting along with our co-passengers and aligning destinations with them. Which time frame are we focusing on because this car can also Time Travel. It can take us to the past, present or future.

And most importantly, are we on autopilot or manual?

The challenge is to know where the primary problem is.

If the problem is no fuel, then easy. Give more fuel. If the problem is not enough brakes, then give better brakes. If the problem is in the driving/steering, then skill building here is required through counseling. 

The biggest challenge is that the problem is often all of the above and driving/steering this Time Machine is not easy. And a word of caution, if we add acceleration to poor steering, then problems can magnify.