Close Enough to Care, Steady Enough to Help

When we care for someone who’s struggling whether we’re a doctor, nurse, carer, parent or friend, it’s natural to feel their pain.

But real compassion means being present with someone’s emotions, not absorbed by them.

One of the many important life skills is to cultivate mindfulness/holding space for the feelings and emotions of others especially with the “uncomfortable painful ones”. It can often be very difficult for many of us to do.

Not too fused or “zoomed into” the feelings and emotions of others but not too detached or “zoomed out” either. 

Too fused or “zoomed into” the feelings and emotions of others and we may “catch it”, suffer with them, burn out and get compassion fatigue.

Too detached or “zoomed out” and we may risk losing empathy, connection and miss the subtle emotional signals behind their communications with us. 

Mindfulness with “the feelings of others” is the “sweet spot”. Not too close but not too far either.