When we are showing excessive “fight or flight” responses with our friends, colleagues, and loved ones, it’s often a sign of stress.
When we dig deeper, it’s usually a sign of NEEDs not met.
Like a plant without enough water, nutrients, and sunlight, it will show signs of stress and failure to thrive.
What needs are often not met?
1. Is it the “bio” physiological needs eg food, water, nutrition, sleep etc. Rate out of 10.
2. Is it the need for safety, security, and control? Rate out of 10.
3. Is it the need for connection? Rate out of 10.
4. Is it the need for newness, growth, and novelty? Rate out of 10.
The answers may guide us.
If the plant needs water. Give it water. If the plant need nutrients, give it nutrients. If the plant needs sunlight, give it sunlight. In that respect, we are not that much different.
Find what we need and try to fulfill that. Don’t be confused by our “fight or fight” responses, and blame the very thing in front of us or ourselves. It may not be the main problem at all.
It’s often a sign that our NEEDs are fundamentally not met.
If it’s “bio”, address that.
If it’s a lack of security and control, address that.
If it’s the lack of connection, address that.
If it’s a lack of newness, growth, and novelty, address that.
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